Derek and Jordan Ward - Explored: OUR PREGNANCY STORY - Have Faith As If Something Has Already Happened

Heartbreaking Infertility

When Derek and I courted and were engaged throughout late 2012-2013, Derek told me he had MMD, Myotonic Muscular Dystrophy, so we knew we may never be able to have children. When I found this out, I did not second guess him or us for even a second! I was more convinced that I loved him and wanted to help him through life just as he would help me. But, the possibility of not being able to have kids made us sad and worried.

We had been told by medical professionals and loved ones that our having children outside of IVF, in vetro fertilization, was impossible due to MMD causing Derek’s sperm count to be extremely low, and that it was not in good judgement anyway since our kids could inherit MMD. They told us these things out of love, but it was disheartening and overwhelming. We felt hopeless the more we talked about this expensive and delicate IVF procedure. We had no idea when we would be able to afford it or if we could even handle it.

Seeking Heaven’s Help

Then we got married and sealed and something happened—we won a free IVF cycle through Pound The Pavement for Parenthood thanks to Derek’s brother Kenny, his wife Emily, and many who prayed for us to win! We were elated though we were still not comfortable with IVF. But soon after winning it, I felt unsettled even after reminding myself of how many people prayed so we could win. After owning this cycle for six months, I finally told Derek how I had been feeling and though he did not feel the same, we agreed to go to the temple for heavenly guidance.

In the temple, we prayed about whether or not we should use our cycle and we both felt a definite no. He was more crushed by this answer than I was since I had been feeling it longer. We then prayed about what to do with our cycle and felt we should give it to a particular family we hardly knew. Kenny and Emily are friends with this amazing family so they got us in touch with them and Pound the Pavement. And to this day, we know that the cycle we won was always meant for us to give to them. God wanted to see that we could do the right thing even when it was hard.

Derek then prayed asking if we would ever have kids and he felt a yes. After this, we both prayed asking if we should save up for another IVF cycle or try to have kids naturally despite all we knew. To our surprise, we felt that we needed to try naturally in patience. This answer was such a shock that we did not even listen to it for six months. Why would God ask us to try the impossible? And risk having a potentially unhealthy baby?

Gaining Courage to Go For It

In spite of everything we had heard, we decided about six months after giving our IVF away that we needed to listen to God more than anyone or anything else. And God sent individuals into our lives that unknowingly helped give us faith. Our religion professor, Brother Gardner, sent us many messages of encouragement about infertility. Karlee, a cousin of Derek’s, told us she knew we would eventually get pregnant during her pregnancy! My friend Anna said the same during hers! And my doctor comforted us about the low sperm count by saying that it only takes one! These voices of hope among others helped fuel us through our six months of trying in vain unbeknownst to anyone.

But In May I felt different and knew I would finally get pregnant. I had strange pains and was the closest to God that I have ever been. And I heard this quote through my friend Erin, “Have faith as if something has already happened,” [by Heidi Crossley] and discerned that this was what we needed to do. A few days later I had a thought cross my mind, “Why are you sad that you are not pregnant? Many would love to just have a happy marriage like yours.” Through these physical and spiritual experiences, God prepared Derek and me all month for what was about to happen.

Is This Real Life?

The night before we took the all-telling test, Derek and I lay wide awake with a surety that we were pregnant. And on May 25th, our beautiful pregnancy test immediately lit up with a deep set pregnancy sign! We were four weeks along! We burst into tears, hugs, smiles from ear to ear, and grateful prayer.

We told our parents when I was at 6 weeks. I got to tell mine and my brother in person since I conveniently had a trip to Texas! We told Derek's parents in person once I got back! They were all so supportive and ecstatic for us. We told some family and friends at 12 weeks. And shortly after, we told everyone because we could no longer wait!

Wonders Never Cease

Our growing family is a testament that miracles still happen. And though we do not know where this pregnancy will lead, if we will eventually do IVF, or if we will ever get pregnant again, we are just grateful that we were even able to get and stay pregnant this long in this miraculous instance. God knew our faith would be strengthened through this!

We testify that God loves all of His children perfectly, knows what is best for us, and is in the details of our lives. Families are forever if we stick to God’s plan. We are extremely blessed and desire that our story can help give insight and hope. And last of all, “Have faith as if something has already happened.”